There's An App For That.

Quite a while ago, I came across a photo editing app called Perfect365. I'm a big fan of Instagram and editing pictures, and ya know, free, so I downloaded it. For a long time it just sat there on my phone, going unused. Finally, one day I decided to open it and try it out.

Turns out, it's an app that allows you to do your makeup in photos. I got a good laugh out of it. Especially when I found the settings that would do crazy makeup and even add wigs. Exhibit A:

Freaky, right? I thought it was pretty hilarious. That was, until last weekend when my husband and I took a picture on our Saturday afternoon adventure and I decided to play with the picture a little because I wasn't wearing any makeup and I figured it would be a perfect use for the app!

Somehow this turned into a weird obsession over the next couple hours. And then I discovered that the app can actually thin out your face and make your eyes bigger, among other things. It will even thin out your eyebrows for you. Essentially, it's the photoshop for your crappy Instagram pictures.

It wasn't until I was trying out the thinning face feature that I had an overwhelming sense of "What am I doing?!" After just barely learning about unrealistic expectations in the media, here I was turning what was actually a fine picture in to something that wasn't real so it would "look better." I was pretty disgusted with myself once I realized the destructiveness of what I was doing, so I ended it right there. 

Media (and Satan) have the sneakiest way of making you think things are important when they just really aren't. Trying to look perfect all of the time is one of them. The app's tagline is "The easiest way to make you look great." Uhhh how about looking great by building self-esteem? Being happy? Taking pride in your unique features and what makes you you? Better yet, how about not caring so much about "looking great" and wearing sweatpants every day because you can and because you just freaking like it?

Sorry. I'm getting carried away. But this little app gave me a new perspective, and I'm so glad I'm more "media-aware" that I was able to catch myself on what I was doing. Needless to say, I won't be using that app anymore. Even over silly Instagram photos, it is just too easy for me to trick myself into thinking I need to "fix" my physical features in order to look good, and I'm just really not okay with that. 

The Thief of Joy

This week I had a very proud moment when my mom posted this quote to Facebook:

What a wonderful reminder that comparison brings nothing but envy, lower self-esteem, pride, self-doubt, and a slew of other unpleasant emotions. Essentially, THE OPPOSITE OF JOY. Duh.

This quote went along perfectly with an article I had already been planning to post about, so I was really excited when it came across my news feed. The article I want to discuss shows a photo series done by a group of moms aiming to empower women to stop comparing themselves to other moms. It's appropriately named "Stop the Mommy Wars." 

With blogs, Facebook, Pinterest, Twitter, Instagram, and [insert a million more social media sites here], it is so easy to see into one another's lives and make snap judgments and comparisons about people we don't even know. And frankly, it's stupid.

After taking so many Human Development courses, I've learned more about children and parenting practices than most people who aren't HD majors may ever learn in their life. And yet after all the theories, research, practices, and "do's and don'ts" I've learned in the last four years, I've also learned this: if you are sincerely doing your best and you aren't a psychopath, your kid will probably turn out just fine. Really.

That is what makes this photo series so great. Instead of an article focused on telling you the "Top 38 Ways to Improve Your [Insert Fictitious Problem Here] Now!", its purely about women relating to each other as mothers and just respecting one another's decisions. That's all. Not advocating, just accepting that different people make different choices.